There’s a silly cultural reference and internet phenomena that claims the brain’s prefrontal cortex is considered “fully developed” by the age of 25. In society, 25 is often the age that you’re expected to have most things in life “all figured out” as a mature, settled down adult. But, a month into being a 25 year old myself—here’s what I’ve learned. 

It’s okay to not have everything exactly figured out right now. Life is full of constant evolution and unforeseen circumstances. So while we may wish to have full control and handle of our lives, because at this age that feels like the “responsible” thing to do, it’s okay to feel lost—as long as you don’t let your circumstances dictate your outlook on life and overall mindset. From a young age, I’ve known firsthand that while you cannot control your circumstances, you can choose to make the best out every situation. In a day and age where it’s easy to compare yourself to everyone else you see posting their seemingly “perfect” lives on social media, it’s important to realize your journey is your own, and there’s no “correct” way to navigate this world we all live in. 

So for me, 25 is finding joy in the small things. Looking around a room, at a dinner table, surrounded by your loved ones, and feeling immense gratitude. It is rediscovering the things that used to make you happy and provide comfort in your youth, such as the movies or music you used to play, and feeling that same sense of joy all over again.

25 is feeling soul-crushing nostalgia in childhood photographs or home videos—realizing you are looking at a moment in time that you cannot get back, and still feeling content, knowing now that you’re exactly where you are meant to be, and that everything that happens in one’s life can either shape you, or break you. It is realizing how far you’ve come and how much farther you have, still, to go. 

For me, 25 was about making a nearly week-long spectacle of my birthday, not out of conceit, but purely from a place of gratitude for life, and all the people I’m lucky enough to have around in mine.

Though only a month into being twenty-five, I vow in this moment to lean more into this gift I have—to keep expressing my thoughts in written words. In time I will continue to treat this blog like my own open journal and share my creations with the world, not under confines of a strict schedule, but freely, as they come to me.

So whether you’re embracing a new age with your “fully developed frontal lobes” or experiencing a “quarter-life crisis”, remember that while growing up seems scary, life is what you make it—this is 25.