One Year of My Debut Poetry Book ‘If I Bare My Soul’!

One year ago today, I took a leap of faith (no pun intended), and released my first-ever book. It was something that had always been this distant dream of mine, but one that seemed like so far-fetched of an idea. However when I found self-publishing, I was finally able to officially pursue this project last January. By July, I had a complete collection of poems and strings of stories woven together straight from my heart.

July 10th, 2024, a day that was supposed to be marked by excitement and self-fulfillment, instead had a dark cloud looming overhead. By this day, it had already been three days since myself and many of others in my whole city had been without electricity. Though I was briefly able to find just enough cell service to share my project, by then every place around me that once looked so full of life, seemingly turned into a ghost town. I spent many sleepless nights in a car, in the thick of summer’s heat, just praying to get out of this testing time as I’d deliriously watch the rise and fall of the sun. It wouldn’t be until two days later that I’d be able to celebrate my debut book having been published.

Fast forward a year later, as I observe all the lives affected by the recent devastating floods in my home state of Texas, I’m reminded of my gratitude for life. While my journey as a self-published author didn’t begin as planned, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I know now that we  can have all these things in our lives meticulously planned out the way we’d hope for them to go, but these expectations might never come to fruition precisely as such, and we have to be accept with that. 

When I say I poured my all into this project, I truly mean it. Admittedly, I haven’t found the words to say (or write), since I spilled my entire soul on those pages bound in this book. It’s a tough feeling, that maybe this book is all I had in me, that I’ve got nothing left to say. Still, I continue to seek inspiration everywhere. I’ve learned to never force art, but to let creativity find me. So while it may seem like I’m achieving nothing in this period of stillness, I am giving myself this time to soak up life like a sponge, to examine the world’s stories, in order to authentically create as I feel the passion to do so. This is only the beginning of my story and I can’t wait to find out what’s next for me.

I want to express my deepest appreciation to anyone who has ever supported me along the way in this journey I’m on as a writer. To any and all family members, friends, or strangers that have purchased my book, I could never thank you enough. To me, this book wasn’t about the performance or numbers, but simply about having a physical representation of my passion for written expression. This was to prove to nobody but myself, that I can set upon anything I put my mind to, and that if my art should speak to anyone else in the world, then it will shall its way to the right people. 

Happy one year of If I Bare My Soul!

✍🏻📖🫀

Nostalgia and Nirvana

I breathe in life, and exhale experiences.
I shed a tear to taste pain.
I lose all my senses,
when I feel these chemicals rushing through my veins like Novocaine.

Some days I dream
of building
a time machine,
as I cling

onto this urge to hit rewind
on moments in life,
and I’m searching for nirvana—this fix, this release
of dopamine.

Because there’s no feeling
more euphoric than reminiscing
upon the past,
wishing you could get the best parts of it back.

No greater high
than to be alive. No better remedy
than creating memories.

Feels like the good old days
are slipping away
but that’s fine
because in time—

I can look back and say
I had never wanted to get so numb on life, that when it passed me by—
I’d forgotten to remember the beauty of yesterday.

You can find this poem in my poetry book If I Bare My Soul: a collection of poetry & prose available to order only on Amazon!